Via Iceland Weather Report, I found this bewildering advertising campaign fronted by John Cleese for the rebranding of an Icelandic bank.

I’ve never been quite sure Cleese has managed his career all that well. After Python, then A Fish Called Wanda, perhaps he should have taken stock of his life. He’d made his money, had a nice life. Many would retire from public scrutiny at that time. Alice Cooper plays golf, Ozzy spends his time analysing dog faeces, surely there was a hobby for John. Parrot Conservation perhaps?. Other entertainers play the waiting game. Chevy Chase and Steve Martin spent some time away, bided their time and found the perfect time to come back into the public eye.

Cleese has never really had this skill. Maybe he needs a Sharon Osbourne figure to advise him. Fierce Creatures and Rat Race show a figure, once idolised around the world for his amazing skills, relying on cameos that rest purely on a former reputation.

Still, personality aside, the advert illustrates something of what has me captivated about Iceland. It’s a country with 1/30th of the population of London. It’s seen as something of a cute place – small and environmentally minded, with shadows of vikings and geological greatness. People have a fondness for it. Despite the cringeworthy backdrop of ‘Rule Brittania’, there’s something lovely about the line “why don’t you just call everybody?”…

The trouble is the putting aside the money and the time, but perhaps most importantly my itchy feet. No, not some terrible Athlete’s complaint, but here’s what happens: You go on any travel website, be it hotels carhire or flights, and you get that delicious drop-down menu. It makes you salivate at it sweet, sugar-coated wares. You tell yourself you’ll just have one, but you’re tempted like some evil devil-bribery to explore the other options. To taste all the fruit on offer. The next thing you know, you’re considering Norway. In March. Believe me, it’s cold in March (minus 3c). But it would be somewhere new, and for some reason I have this desire to see everywhere, all at once. Well, certainly everywhere cold for the time being. Perhaps it’s because I want to see it before the doom-mongering scientists are proved right and everywhere starts to resemble Egypt on a hot Tuesday, but probably just because I’m a cold-dweller. That is to say, I like the cold. I hate the hot months – they’re associated with the bad stuff like Hayfever, Asthma, sore contact lenses and having to bare my legs to the world. Much more for me the necessity of a good water-proof coat, mittens and boots in front of a roaring fire.

So here I am planning my (ahem) Summer Holiday. Somewhere cold, damp(ish), possibly necessitating a four-wheel drive hire car (which doesn’t damage daisies or pleasant green boggy fields too much). Norway, Iceland, Finland, the world is my oyster. Well, a snow oyster at any rate…

The truth is though, right now, this exact second, I’d love to be floating around the Blue Lagoon in Iceland. With it’s amazing geothermal pool/spa generated by the geothermal electricity plant nearby. It’s amazing blue water…

So where’s my postcard? Maybe on its own little holiday. Maybe it’ll send me a postcard!